Tonight A and I were discussing men, (as per uzh), but in particular, the fascinating phenomenon of the ability for a guy to totally quash one's libido. I'm not referring to such qualities like bad teeth, having a lax attitude to deodorant, or not being able to get ole' Schooner up and sailing, non.

What I'm talking about, is confidence.

This is so often commonly mixed up with that other nasty personality trait; arrogance. Which is just SO fucking annoying to deal with. But anyway, back to the post at hand.

Walking the fine line between having the right amount of dominance and showing off that you do, in fact produce testosterone; and being a cocky asshole is hard, sure. But I am a firm believer that it is easier to tone down Mr. Jock-whose-shit-doesn't-stink-and-gets-all-the-bitches than inject manly man into Mr. I'm-shy-and-can't-assert-myself.

I just can not, can NOT deal with guys who don't display what they want! Granted, a pre-req for that is actually knowing what they do want, which is a totally different issue unto itself which I don't dare get into... but always having to make the decisions, never being surprised or always calling the shots.. not only is it tiring, but once you get the guy in the sack chances are it'll be like you're a on a movie set directing a young, new actor; who bless his little heart is so eager to please, but just gets so wrapped up in "am I doing okay?" "are you sure?" "was I good?" that it toootally cools the jets.

And let's be clear, by dominant I don't mean whips and chains, nor am I only referring to bedroom activities. No. I mean, guys, do the female race a favour and assert yourself. Whether it's asking the girl to dance, spontaneously taking her out, or pushing her up against a wall and holding her hands above her head, trust me. You won't regret it.